|
|
|
121.
|
Suicide Booth: You are now dead! Thank you for using Stop and Drop, America's favorite since
2008.
|
|
122.
|
Whatever it is -- I didn't do it!
|
|
123.
|
If everything is coming your way, then you're in the wrong lane.
|
|
124.
|
At my age I do what Mark Twain did. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if
I'm not there I carry on as usual.
|
|
125.
|
My problems all started with my early education. I went to a school for mentally disturbed
teachers.
|
|
126.
|
Insanity is hereditary - you get it from your children.
|
|
127.
|
Landing: A controlled mid-air collision with a planet.
|
|
128.
|
A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.
|
|
129.
|
Psychology. Mind over matter. Mind under matter? It doesn't matter. Never mind.
|
|
130.
|
A raccoon tangled with a 23,000 volt line today. The results blacked out 1400 homes and, of
course, one raccoon.
|
|
131.
|
For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let
them fight it out.
|
|
132.
|
If you're at the airport and see mistle toe above the conveyor belt... You can kiss your
luggage goodbye!
|
|
133.
|
Women like silent men, they think they're listening.
|
|
134.
|
A tennis ball should always be served but not eaten.
|
|
135.
|
FATAL ERROR: Size of thought exceeds available memory.
|
|
136.
|
"My dad wants to show he's not mad by taking you out hunting with him"
|
|
137.
|
"The obvious mathematical breakthrough would be development of an easy way to factor large
prime numbers." Bill Gates, The Road Ahead, Viking Penguin (1995)
|
|
138.
|
Eat At Ed's Sushi Bar and Bait Shop
|
|
139.
|
Lawyers, MBA's, RIAA? A jedi fears not these things!
|
|
140.
|
Paco's Bean Barn & Service Station - "Eat here and get gas."
|
|
|
funny headlines
